Captain Schmideo2

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Posts by Captain Schmideo2

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  21

  If you read the bible w/out instruction, what would you think?

  by TTWSYF in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  anyone reading [or did read] the bible without someone else telling you what it meant?.

  would you be leaning towards the jws or baptists or lutherans or what?.

  just asking.

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  Captain Schmideo2

  It is full of interest. It has noble poetry in it; and some clever fables; and some blood-drenched history; and some good morals; and a wealth of obscenity; and upwards of a thousand lies.
  - Mark Twain
  
  The two Testaments are interesting, each in its own way. The Old one gives us a picture of these people's Deity as he was before he got religion, the other one gives us a picture of him as he appeared afterward.
  - Mark Twain

  When one reads Bibles, one is less surprised at what the Deity knows than at what He doesn't know.

  - Mark Twain
  
  
  
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  42

  Learn To Speak Like A Jehovah's Witness

  by pale.emperor in

  1. social
  2. humour

  for those who were never a jw, here's a fun guide to passing yourself as one:.

  privilege [priv-lij] - a duty nobody would volunteer to do which is assigned to you without your say so.

  such as cleaning the toilets, picking up other brats candy wrappers in the back row and being stuck on locking up duty for the 7th time in a row.. df'd [dee-eff'd] - disfellowshipped.

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  Captain Schmideo2

  Pagan- Any custom or practice that has roots in pre-Christian (or non-Fundamental) practices, like Birthdays and Holidays. Does not apply to Wedding Ceremonies and all the standard accoutrements (ie:White wedding dress, bridesmaids, wedding rings, kiss the bride, wedding reception, because then you would see the young women leaving in droves).
  
  Memorial "Talk"-In which an "Elder" spares about 90 seconds reading from the obituary printed in the local newspaper about a member who served faithfully for his entire life, after which the remaining 28 minutes 30 seconds is spent standing on the corpse while the talk shifts to promotion of the "unique" beliefs that the JWs have and which the deceased is supposed to have held. This is followed by:
  
  The Get-Together after the Memorial (see "Pagan" above)- In which the relatives of the deceased are supposed to pony up sandwiches and other items for those that were at least thoughtful enough to show up for the Memorial "Talk". Expect better eats if the deceased was from a "well-to-do" situation.
  
  Talk- A verb that is turned into a noun, and is actually referring to a sermon (but that's a Christendom term, so it's not used.)
  
  Christendom-Literally, the Kingdom of Christ. Was used in the past by kingdoms and nation-states in the past as a self label for "Christian" (as opposed to Muslim or other pagan) nations. Now used as expression of loathing by JW's, as in "those nations that claim to be Christian, but they are not. They are 'Christendom'.
  
  
  
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  10

  Ever notice this contradiction?

  by stuckinarut2 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  so witnesses love using the scripture that says that "narrow and cramped is the road to life, and few are the ones finding it" as proof that they have the truth.

  yes, a small number.. yet they also love boasting about the "increases in numbers coming into the truth" as proof of jehovah's blessing of the society!.

  so, which is it?

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  Captain Schmideo2

  https://youtu.be/_jxhtDEf3rY

  Alternative Kingdom Melody #1 "Good Things Bad Things"

  Pretty much sums it up.
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  54

  where have the demons gone?

  by aboveusonlysky in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  does anybody remember some of the sensational demon stories jw's would tell back in the day?

  i was a kid in the early 80's and i remember a few times hearing of people having real life encounters with demons.

  for example, one sister claimed that before she became a jdub she would regularly talk to demons and they would even fix stuff like her washing machine!

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  Captain Schmideo2

  Yesterday morning, I was woken from my sleep because something was rocking my bed back and forth. This force also moved through the house and shook my son's bed and the chair my wife was sleeping in.
  
  Pretty scary stuff...for seismic forces from an earthquake! (Not something we used to have in my state previously, but thanks to the practices of the Oil and Gas industry, has been very common this decade).
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  17

  I need help, I'm falling in love with a JW girl

  by nebula-- in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  so i met her at my last job that i worked & we started off as friends.

  i didn't know her faith at the time & i honestly couldn't have cared less, seeing as i'm agnostic.

  after about a year, i began developing emotions for her & sure enough, we ended up dating for a little while.

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  Captain Schmideo2

  If you think converting to please her is a good idea, it's not.

  The JW life is a commitment to more than just going to the meetings. You will be expected to give up so much of your previous life (bad, good, or relatively harmless) just to meet this crazy standard that the Org expects of its members.
  
  Passion fades with time, what is left over better be built on honesty and truthfulness. Going through outward motions just to achieve her as a prize will make you happy for a little while, but eventually, you are going to need something more in your life than "faking it".
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  14

  My son just got a serious job offer

  by Captain Schmideo2 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  and it looks like he will be accepting it.he will be teaching english as a second language in shenzhen, china.

  it's with a company that works with the public school system out there.his salary includes an apt (most likely shared) that has utilities and internet included, and looking at cost of living (after the rent he isn't paying) it looks like he will be able to put money aside every month.not bad for a kid his age-travel to the other side of the globe, meet new people, get paid, and get experience.

  i am going to miss him..

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  Captain Schmideo2

  Actually, Fortune Cookies are not Asian, they were invented in San Francisco.

  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fortune_cookie

  
  
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  14

  My son just got a serious job offer

  by Captain Schmideo2 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  and it looks like he will be accepting it.he will be teaching english as a second language in shenzhen, china.

  it's with a company that works with the public school system out there.his salary includes an apt (most likely shared) that has utilities and internet included, and looking at cost of living (after the rent he isn't paying) it looks like he will be able to put money aside every month.not bad for a kid his age-travel to the other side of the globe, meet new people, get paid, and get experience.

  i am going to miss him..

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  Captain Schmideo2

  ...and Skype is one of the few apps that isn't blocked by The Great Firewall. :)
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  14

  My son just got a serious job offer

  by Captain Schmideo2 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  and it looks like he will be accepting it.he will be teaching english as a second language in shenzhen, china.

  it's with a company that works with the public school system out there.his salary includes an apt (most likely shared) that has utilities and internet included, and looking at cost of living (after the rent he isn't paying) it looks like he will be able to put money aside every month.not bad for a kid his age-travel to the other side of the globe, meet new people, get paid, and get experience.

  i am going to miss him..

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  Captain Schmideo2

  Gee Nate, what did I ever do to you to get this kind of comment?
• 
  14

  My son just got a serious job offer

  by Captain Schmideo2 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  and it looks like he will be accepting it.he will be teaching english as a second language in shenzhen, china.

  it's with a company that works with the public school system out there.his salary includes an apt (most likely shared) that has utilities and internet included, and looking at cost of living (after the rent he isn't paying) it looks like he will be able to put money aside every month.not bad for a kid his age-travel to the other side of the globe, meet new people, get paid, and get experience.

  i am going to miss him..

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  Captain Schmideo2

  and it looks like he will be accepting it.
  He will be teaching English as a second language in Shenzhen, China. It's with a company that works with the public school system out there.
  
  His salary includes an apt (most likely shared) that has utilities and internet included, and looking at cost of living (after the rent he isn't paying) it looks like he will be able to put money aside every month.
  
  Not bad for a kid his age-travel to the other side of the globe, meet new people, get paid, and get experience. I am going to miss him.
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  8

  Conventions that are out of touch with reality

  by Captain Schmideo2 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  watching the news from the past few nights, i have come to the conclusion that the only convention that's crazier and more out of touch with reality than a jw convention is a us political convention.the strange-o show that is going on right now in cleveland, oh makes watching a bunker video look more sober and realistic by comparison.i have made the effort to do my civic duties as a voter, but these conventions require a devotion that is fanatical..

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  Captain Schmideo2

  One big difference is the restraint that the JW's exercise in the assembly. Sure there is a lot applause at the weirdest, meanest, and dumbest things, but you don't get the shouting, the chanting, the interactivity that the politicos get to engage in.